Fight Club

Have you ever watched Fight Club before? Stupid movie in my opinion, but then again I am not a guy and I don't like to beat up people...physically at least. I am well versed in emotional destruction.

My hubby and I fight. We fought for the first 10 years in bad ways. Yelling, screaming, calling each other names, pushing each others buttons, threats to walk away, the D word, throwing things, and we never prayed together.

So...we now have rules for fighting. I personally think ALL couples should have rules for fighting, but they both need to agree on the rules. Just like you have Learning Agreements in school, in office training programs or Scouting.

Words are a double edge sword...we do not use, "Why or You, Always, Never, or Every time."
We do not call each other names.
The D word in NEVER an option.
I choose him...he choose me.
Don't tell him how he feels, it will only be taken as disrespectful.
God gave us two ears and one mouth so we will listen more than we talk.
The louder one gets the quieter the other becomes. More can be said in a whisper than a scream.
When a touchy subject is hit, one says, 'I smell smoke.' It is a signal to the other that we need to stop talking and pray together.

We have found praying together so foundational. It is a way for me to hear his heart and where he is at and vice versa. We are able to share our thoughts and feelings in a third party way so less judgment about what is being said can heard and received.

Matthew 18:20

New International Version (NIV)

20 For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.”

How the movie would change if it was a Prayer Club instead of a Fight Club.